Consider that the rise of the Trophy Generation mentality has coincided perfectly with the repression of conflict between children as evidenced by anti-bullying and the expansion of gender and racial equality campaigns.
Maybe you have to use trophies the way the Romans used bread and circuses. The purpose of trophy giving is not to make everyone a winner. It’s to keep anyone from feeling like a loser. This is important because resentment is the root of violence.
The healthy loser becomes motivated by admiration for excellence and is at best a booster for the establishment. This move, however, requires a transcendental perspective which elevates interpersonal relationships beyond the present moment, such as religion. Most less successful individuals historically resent other people, segregating into separate groups and classes and rejecting the values and cultural practices of others by developing preferences of their own – work with your hands instead of your mind (or vice-versa depending on your historical epoch), or become scholastic if sports aren’t your thing, mutatis-mutandis.
Affect research and theorists such as Jones (Affect as Process) and Lichtenberg (Motivational Systems Theory) have pointed out that the human motivation for hierarchy and competition occurs most powerfully in latency children (~5 years to puberty), at exactly that time period during which the trophy phenomenon is most pronounced. Could it be that the discomfort adults feel with competition is causing them to disrupt a developmental milestone?
The best criticism of this factor, adult narcissism projected onto children, is of course made by the now dormant thelastpsychiatrist.com. His critiques, however, often result in blaming baby-boomers for the problems they themselves blame “kids-today” for.
I think a deeper perspective can be gleaned by considering that the other-hatred and powerful identifications of the latency period go underground if not allowed to develop naturally, turning into the narcissism of adults who either deny (and project) or symptomatically over-express (and deny) those most natural of human emotions – interpersonal present-moment hatred, jealousy and resentment.
The only rejoinders to this position of accepting “crass” emotions I see are the religious one, for which gods get the credit, or the neo-liberal one – for which you get a trophy.